Happy August everyone! And I say that without a trace of sincerity. Seriously. F$&% this year. I doubt I’m alone in saying that either.
Well, okay, there’s a TRACE of sincerity. First, I do hope YOU have a happy August. I’m sick of this year, but I’m not an a$&hole. Well, I am an a$&hole. It’s complicated. Second, things have normalized a bit here at Angry Games HQ. So, it is shaping up to be an okay August. Even ten days in. I’ve got a new workflow, a solid plan, and a few weeks of quiet time to make it all work. No, I didn’t get rid of The Tiny GM. Or Biscuit. They’re both still here. Except Tiny is taking a much needed and well-deserved vacation because she’s been busting a$& at her day job. And Biscuit is fairly good at entertaining herself when she’s not sleeping through the workday.
All in all, things are looking up. I’m even feeling better. But you don’t give a f$&% about me. You just want to know when to expect articles, live chats, and s$&% like that. So, let’s get to the update.
New Schedule; Same as the Old Schedule… With a Twist
In my last mailbag article, I addressed a bunch of e-mails calling me out for my crazy-a$& release schedule – or lack thereof – and for my inability to deliver on my promises. Totally fair and deserved emails. You can read the whole answer if you want, but here’s a Short, Non-Rambling version:
Starting on August 3, a new feature article will be shared with supporters via my Patreon feed every Friday. That same article will be freely available the following Wednesday at TheAngryGM.com for everyone else to enjoy. That’s not technically a new schedule. It’s the schedule I’ve always said I would follow. The difference is that now, if I don’t get the article to my Patrons on time on Friday, I won’t collect a pledge for that article. If I can’t deliver my articles on time, I don’t get paid for them.
My Patrons saw a new article last Friday, August 7. The rest of you will see it on Wednesday, August 12. So, I’m on schedule so far. And I don’t doubt I’ll stay on schedule. Which brings me to…
A Personal Favor
After I told everyone I’d be risking a pretty sizeable chunk of my income on my ability to hit a deadline and that I was thoroughly disgusted with and ashamed of myself for getting so badly off the update thing, a lot of folks reached out to me via e-mail and direct message or left comments on my site. The messages were well-intentioned and heartfelt attempts to talk me out of this ploy, to forgive me, and to caution me against setting myself up for failure.
I’m really touched by everyone’s concern. I’m grateful for everyone’s understanding. And I’m asking you all to please stop it. Just stop. Your heart is in the right place, but you’re giving me the wrong advice. And if I listen, it’ll make things worse, not better.
My problem isn’t that I try to do too much in too little time. That’s never been my issue. I’m a tremendously hard worker. I can do amazing things. I can get a lot of done. I’m not overwhelmed by the amount of work I’ve put on myself. And pledging to put out an article a week is kind of UNDERPROMISING. It’s a small, starter promise. The problems I’m struggling with are different. They have to do with accountability, discipline, conscientiousness, and my inability to properly process stress, anxiety, and anger. Which is more than I wanted to tell any of you. But here we are.
I don’t need to be let off the hook. Or be told to take my time. Or cautioned to underpromise. Because that’s the s$&% that holds me back. This is actually something a lot of self-employed people have to deal with. The lack of accountability can ruin you if you don’t know how to hold yourself properly accountable. Especially when it collides with other personal issues you’ve been ignoring or denying for a long time and delusions that you work better under stress. Or that you need stress to work properly. I’m not doing this because I can’t handle the work. I’m doing this to align my external accountability with the goals I know I can achieve. I have not yet failed to put out four articles a month – except one time when I took a vacation that I announced in advance – and I’m not going to start failing now. But I need to start managing that work better to create the space I need to also work on other things. Otherwise, all I will ever do is put out four articles a month.
And you should know that I ain’t doing this alone. I have a support network. I have doctors. I have a mental health treatment regimen. I have friends and family members who understand the real issues and who are helping me out. I didn’t just pull this out of my a$&. This ain’t Tumblr and I don’t do self-diagnosis. Yes, I might fail and it might hurt, but that’s kind of the point. Anything worth doing carries a risk. And I haven’t been taking enough risks lately. That’s also part of the problem. Safety nets sometimes make things worse.
I appreciate that you all want what’s best for me. I treasure the support and encouragement I get from this community. Please don’t stop. But remember that it’s dangerous to give specific advice to people to deal with specific problems without asking a lot of questions first. There’s very, VERY few of you who know enough about what’s actually going on right now – what I’m actually overcoming – to give me good advice about it. And letting me off the hook and giving me excuses is the worst thing you can do.
So, thank you. But stop. I’ve never asked you this before, but please stop being my friends for a little while and just be my customers. Treat me like someone you have a contract with. Tit for tat. Support for great gaming articles. Otherwise, I’ll never grow beyond that. And I’ll end up hating myself. I’m not that likeable anyway. Stop liking me dammit.
Okay. That’s my personal message. Back to real business.
But seriously. Thank you.
The Inevitability of Taxes and Patreon Changes
Earlier this summer and in accordance with various laws, Patreon started collecting sales and use tax from some supporters in some jurisdictions for some pledges. That money doesn’t go to creators. It goes from supporters directly to theirs states, counties, or local taxing agencies. If you noticed a change – and it would have been small – I’m sorry I didn’t pass that information along sooner. I dropped the ball and missed the update on this.
This month, I made some changes to my support tiers to provide better information to Patreon about how your pledge is allocated between the different rewards you receive. Specifically, to note that the vast majority of your pledge goes to supporting my site and that you receive no tangible goods or services for that support. Just the warm, fuzzy feeling of knowing that, thanks to you,
And, just to warn you, Patreon is also planning an update whereby you’ll be able to pledge your support in a couple of local currencies – UK pounds and Euros to start – instead of the almighty US dollar. Patreon’s changes will result in some of the currency conversion fees associated with your pledge to shift from your end to my end. I’ll keep you apprised of the changes when they happen. Be aware, you’ll have to change your currency preference manually if you want to opt in.
Live Chat
Originally, I was going to do my monthly Discord live chat thing on Tuesday, August 11. But there’s been a last-minute change to Allie’s trip plans and I have to postpone it. The live chat will be on Wednesday, August 12 at 8:00 PM EDT. Sorry for the inconvenience.
A recording of the chat will be available to all my Patreon supporters within 48 hours of the chat.
In the Works
That’s the big news, firm promises, and overly detailed personal disclosures. Now, here’s a few other things I’ve got in the works you might want to know about.
First, the tie-in module promised in my book is simmering away. For really real. I know you’ve heard that before and I’ll understand if you won’t believe it until you see it. Currently, it looks like it’ll be available in mid-September. Probably about a month from now, give or take a week. I’m not going to make the end-of-August release because of that health emergency that sidelined me last month.
Second, I’m planning to reorganize my Discord server. Things are a bit unintuitive and scattered in there. I’m going to clean it up, move some channels around, add some things, and firm up the rules so everyone knows what to expect. That’ll likely hit in a few weeks. Maybe sooner than you think.
Third and last, I’m working on changes to how my patronage is structured and working on alternate ways for you to support my work if you’d like to avoid – or leave – Patreon. It’s in the early planning stages now and it’ll probably be a month before I’m ready to roll out changes, but they might happen sooner. I will still be here on Patreon, though. I’m not leaving. Just adding options.
And with those changes will also come some changes to the rewards I offer. I know the Secret Stash is really anemic these days, for example. It’s hard to share my personal gaming content when I’ve had to put all my personal games on hold. I’m looking at different ways to provide bonus content and special events for the folks who support me at the highest levels. So, look for more details about that in the coming weeks.
As always, thank you all for your support, readership, encouragement, trust, and understanding. I’m working extremely hard to be worthy of it. Thanks for sticking with me. And please trust me that I’m giving myself the best chance to succeed right now. I know we all want to be playing SMAFARGE! someday sooner rather than later.
Writing about accountability might be interesting and useful to more people than you think, perhaps in terms of how it helps to write adventures or RPG content, if you come across any insights on your own journey. Plenty of roleplaying ideas out there, not nearly as much how-to (you’re in that category IMO), barely anything on the craftsmanship/process. Not your bag? Cool. Just a suggestion.
As a lazy, procrastinating, blue-collar gm that has a 65-70 ish hour workweek, I have to second this. I used to mostly improv, read: wing, my games on a 40hr week and, uh, it’s just… tough… to keep a consistent GMing workload or a group going anymore. Jotting notes has become the absentminded day-hobby of a doddering middleaged geezer. Some tips on accountability from the sensei who gives no guff would be more than welcome and might be more useful and enlightening than a thousand self help books.
What you need is some good ol’ advice from Larry Winget and I don’t give a damn if this makes the comment section or not. Shut up, stop whining, and get to work!
Basically yeah.
It beggars belief that the Angry GM could have anger issues.
What’s really funny is how long I was in denial about it.
What’s not funny is replying with “in the Nile? I thought you live in the US?”, so I won’t do that..
I have to say, when I read how you were going to be managing your own accountability, my reaction wasn’t “Shame, don’t be so hard on yourself”. My immediate thought was “Good for you. That may take some balls, but it is the right and ethical way to run a business” (and if you’re getting paid for it, it is really a business).
Agreed. Fair shake to the actual patrons happy to support the whole ‘haunted artiste’ motif. But Angry’s never been much of an Amadeus.
I do swear a lot.
If you can do a videoblog entry while timing your cusses to an impromtu piece on a harpsichord, I’ll put money towards a fancy powdered wig.
Just so you’re aware, you seem to use Tiny’s actual name in the article (in the live chat section). I feel like its probably intentional but it costs me basically nothing to give you a heads up, right?
Let me see. A flawed work schedule that seem to cause you pain in your private life and makes your work situation vulnerable. The self-awareness to recognise your failings, hopes of making bigger things in the RPG-world, and idealistic work ethics, which makes you take agency and grow.
MAN my brain really wants to trick me into thinking you’re a real human being! You even have a strong (Angry) personality!